freshblogtips: blogging tips with a creative twist

Curses!

I received my first hate mail last week.

I know. Moi?

It has taken all of my strength, but I decided that I am not going to reply to her email directly. With a nod to Dooce and her infamous hate mail posts, I've decided to post it on my blog instead.

Without further ado...

Hello Colleen
Today was the first time and last time I will ever go to your website. I started reading and read a curse.
I then went to your profile and when you talked about cursing too much I had to heartily agree.
I am a Christian, and those words are not in my vocabulary. I stick to the Christian Internet Code of Ethics, where it talks about not visiting websites that compromise my life in Christ. Do I think I am better than you? No, Jesus says we are all born sinners! But I am a sinner saved by grace,the blood shed by Jesus on the cross!! "But I say unto you, that every idle word that men shall speak,  they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment". Matthew 12:36. I hope and pray that you may see this and accept Jesus as your Saviour.
Sincerely,  the Servant

I would love to tell her that I curse because it brings a sense of levity and irreverence to the seemingly mundane topic of yard sales. And I curse on my blog because I occasionally curse in real life. I write the same way that I talk. My cursing has nothing to do with God or religion. Nothing that I write in my blog would personally offend a normal person. (Unless you are averse to stories about defloration on bridal night or throwing pennies at hookers. Which I would totally understand.)

No, I don't think an email response would have been constructive for either of us. She wrote about her ethical & religious beliefs, and any smart-ass reply that I write would not convince her to change her point-of-view. The same way that her email doesn't convince me to get my ass to church.

And that is fine with me. She has strong beliefs, which I completely respect. I'm never going to sway her to think differently. So, it doesn't make sense for me to waste energy on a potentially ugly email exchange.

Don't get me wrong - I love a good debate. Just ask my neighbor, the Tastykake Man. We almost got into a fist fight while we were debating the merits of alternative energy for automobiles.

But when it comes to my blog that has nothing to do with politics or religion, I've learned that I shouldn't waste time arguing with strangers about politics or religion.

How about you? Have you ever received negative comments or emails because of something you wrote on your blog? How did you respond? How would you have responded if you received the same email?

P.S Thank you to all of the lovely freshvintage readers who left very nice comments when I wrote about my hate mail. I am going to re-read all of your comments whenever I feel stupid and depressed and don't want to get out of bed.

P.S.S. Here is the Christian Internet Code of Ethics. I think the one that talks about "not visiting websites that compromise my life in Christ" is really referring to pornography. Not blogs about Pyrex and vintage rick-rack.

Awards and Tagging: The Ugly Truth (+ Fresh Ideas)

I'll start this conversation with a comment that I received from Teena on my first post:

I recently got my first awards but the badges were ugly. Both the kind lady who sent them and I agreed on this - but we didn't dare change them before passing them on - also sometimes the award 'rules of acceptance' are a bit overtly promotional - could we have changed those too? I'm thinking of developing my own awards to issue - any rules?

I have a feeling that I'm not the only one who agrees with Teena. Now, don't get me wrong - I am always flattered when someone tags me or sends me an award. But when I receive an award, I rarely display it on my blog. And I've only participated in a tag once, even though I've been tagged 3 or 4 times. There are a few reasons:

• I'd rather not veer from my theme of vintage finds, because that is really why most people visit my blog.
• I'm not always comfortable saying "Hey, look - I got an award!"
• I don't want to impose on other bloggers by asking them to participate in an award/tag
• Most award graphics don't follow my design aesthetic (okay - they are ugly)

To me, awards and tagging are essentially the same thing. We are trying to achieve two goals when we tag someone or send them an award:

1. Recognize bloggers that we like
2. Increase traffic to our own blogs by encouraging others to link back to us

I want to make it clear that I'm not looking down on people who send awards and participate in tags. I've done it myself, so that would be a little hypocritical. But, don't you think it is time to shake things up a bit? There are different ways to achieve those two goals without sending the traditional awards. Here are four alternatives:

1.  Break the Rules

The part of award-giving that we all hate is that damn list of rules. So, why have them? Teena asked how she should approach sending her own awards. Whatever you do, don't make people have to work in order to accept your award.  If you make a charming/captivating/funky/amusing award, maybe people will actually want to pass it on and link back to you (without you even asking).

2. The Award Is in the Mail

We are all creative people here, right? Recognize your favorite bloggers by mailing them a small token. As in snail mail. Nothing huge. Maybe just an altered tag that has "Best Blogger" stamped on it. Or a funky certificate that you designed. If you make it unique enough, I guarantee that the recipient won't be embarrassed to write about it on their blog (goal #2). Personally, I would rather have a collection of handmade awards than butt-ugly clipart.

Sue from Vintage Rescue Squad mailed Cheryl from Stash Studios a vintage Girl Scout Photography Badge. Sue wanted to let Cheryl know that she recognizes her talent in photography (goal #1). I LOVE this idea because it is specific to the recipient and Sue didn't provide a list of rules that Cheryl had to follow. Sue achieved goal #2 because Cheryl linked back to her blog to thank her.

3. Feature Your Faves in the Sidebar

You most likely have a blogroll in your sidebar already, but how about featuring certain bloggers in a section that changes each month or week? This will also keep your static blogroll from getting out of control. Some ideas:

• Blog-of-the-week
• Themed list of monthly favorites (such as local bloggers or crafty bloggers or bloggers with attitude)
• Create a list of specific posts that are your favorites, instead of just links to blogs

4. Hold Your Own Awards Ceremony

Dedicate a post to all of your favorite bloggers by creating different awards for each of them, like Most Creative, Blogger with the Hottest Husband, Blogger Most Likely to Need Her Mouth Washed Out with Soap, etc. It isn't necessary to create actual graphics. If you make this an annual event (or seasonal, at most) it will garner more attention than if you just presented random awards every few weeks. Accompany it with a giveaway, and you will get more traffic than you can imagine!

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Some final thoughts from Emily Blog Post:

Don't feel obligated to participate in an award or tag if you don't want to. It's your blog, dammit!

If you tag or reward someone, don't take it personally if a recipient doesn't want to participate. It's their blog, dammit!

Acknowledge an award even if you don't plan to participate. Say thanks in a comment on the giver's blog or reply to their email.b

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What do you think? Will I be revered or reviled for proposing alternatives to the run-of-the-mill awards? Do you have any other ideas to add to my list? I would love to hear them!

*Thanks to Kim from The Last House blog for giving me the idea for "Emily Blog Post"!